Great, now what do I do with it?

O vanity!

The first thing any internet novice does (or second thing, for those who got it for the porn) is google themselves. It is a fundamentally sound practice. Anyone you know—or don't know—in the material world can and probably will google you. It's always a good idea to know about yourself what everybody else knows.

For those of us with rather generic names, and for whom vainglory is a higher priority than privacy, the vanity search can be a deflating experience. It's like when, in your childhood, you encounter a kid whose first name is the same as yours, and you punch him because it's your name and he can't have it, he'll have to get another one, dammit.

(The related and equally depressing exercise is trying to get a decent Hotmail username. You can tell a lot about a person from the username they choose after Hotmail informs them of their complete nominal ubiquity, I've always thought. In many cases, all you'll ever need to know about them.)

Anyway, it's been a long time since I last did a vanity search. I'm writing to tell you that in the intervening time, I have gone from being the 23rd to the most famous Joseph Pearson on the planet.

Yes, okay, that's enough, settle down, settle down. Anyway, in celebration, I put down a few pennies on a vanity domain. Hence the title of this post. Don't click it, you'll only experience a somewhat underwhelming sense of de ja vu.

That urge sated, and with my cranium suitably inflated, I thought I might do a few vanity-by-proxy searches. My girlfriend, in spite of having two surnames to choose from, is unfortunately buried in a googlanche of Kellys both Gillespie and Fitzgerald. Most of my drinking buddies suffer a similar fate.

The Kid PeterExcept my colleague, Peter, who comes in at three on the big G, thanks to his relatively uncommon family name and his partnership in the scam venture.

In the process I discovered, to my mild surprise, that Peter is the author of an arcane and erudite tract on the application of Martin Heidegger's philosophy to the construction of technological music.

I presumptuously submit it to you.

Link: When Music Meets Technology (feat. "How to make technological music within Heidegger's guidelines.")

Joseph | 18 Feb 2004

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